plooptionary

plooptionary - ploop’s weasel words and bullshit phrases fresh from the reeking bowels of consultants. (5 of 100)

Today’s phrase comes from the aviation industry but has crept into the wider world by the ever guffing management consultancy anus.  Cheers to Laura from a well know stockbrokers for the ‘heads up’.

* "Behind the power curve": The context here is a large city bank in September.  All of the analysts have been away for an August break and this is the first meeting to discuss the markets at large.  All but one of the people present have dutifully kept themselves informed of market movements during the break - via their crackberries, WAP enabled wives and 9th Generation ether children.  Jim Baldock hasn’t seen the news since late July as he was bury wiping out a whole month snorting his bonus off the backs of various working ladies in Thailand.  Clearly nervous his lack of committment to the financial markets would be uncovered he launches in to an early salvo - picking some rather inconsequential matter and admitting he’s not too well briefed on it.  The aim here is to divert attention from all the important stuff he’s also oblivious to by stiching up someone a little less quick off the mark.  Jim’s choice of words boasts a hugely impressive knowledge of the plooptionary, "Guys, hope you nailed some good recharge time over the last 30.  I’m sure we’ll discuss the wider markets in a moment, but I could just park something with you vis-a-vis Knottle Steel PLC.  I’m a little behind the power-curve on their play in Iran … Greg, what’s say you cover than one off for us early doors?"

I know you’ll agree ‘behing the power’ curve is a blue0rinsed triumph of balls.  Meaning I know nothing about - it somehow makes that sound like a positive.  It suggest that you are, of course, on or in front of the power curve on everything else!

Thaks for all your words and phrases - keep them coming.

Actually, before you comment, wander over here and check out the lovingly taken photographs.  This guy can write and there’s something marvellously gentle in the love of his art.

I’ve also been boring people here with some turkish trance I’ve found over here http://www.turkishmusic.org/index7.html. Sufi Dreams - Mercan Dede is the guy at the bottom I’ve been listening to and it rocks.

And, if you’ve got nothing more important to do than wander round blogs like a total waster pootle over here - the wider point is fun, and I love this idiotic aspect to customer service.  However the bit I adore is the quote from Matthew - he went to pick up a repaired dehumidifier … how specific.  Almost accidental Paul Auster style story telling,

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