We love astrology. Nothing makes more sense than your destiny being dictated by stars so far away that, by the time you see them, they’ve burned out. It makes perfect sense. I also adore astrologers. I love their cute ‘mystical’ names, their incredibly accurate and precise copy, and the way they make huge amounts of money from the vulnerable by insisting people pay £1/$2 a minute to listen to their predictions for the future.
Frankly, the law of relitivity is bunkum. Astrology is where it’s at and ploop intend to cash in. Taurus is all over us this month so I’m going to sort you lot out first - for free. Anyone else wanting to know their stars could email me at ploop at plooptionary dot com and I will let them know how they can deposit £15,000 in our offshore account - we’ll then spend all of 50 seconds creating a bespoke paragraph of astrology bollocks just for you.
Taurus 20 April - 20 May
What seemed to start as idle chat with friends, family or someone else could well turn out to be an important discussion. Don’t be overcome with emotion - as the communication planet Mercury moves into view, you need to keep your head. Keep up to date but allow yourself time to focus on new ideas … innovation is something others look for in you. But, at 19:48 tonight something catastophic is going to happen - you could well die if you don’t call 0870 -9810324 23423423 and give me your American Express number and FedEx me a box of Cohiba No. 3s.
astrology ploop plooptionary taurusastrology ploop plooptionary taurusPopularity: 6% [?]
If you're new here, you may want to subscribe to my feed or email alerts (on the right hand of the page) so you'll be first to know when we update with more drivel!. . That would rock!
If you liked my post, feel free to subscribe to my rss feeds
BlogoSquare
5 Comments so far (Add 1 more)