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It does interest me, although not that much, that certain attributes tend to find certain people. It can’t be a coincidence, for example, that UFO’s only ever land in the gardens of people who dribble when they’re being interviewed on TV. You can’t tell me it’s a fluke that everyone who is gifted the ability to read the future from a crystal ball always looks a bit mystical and witchy. And people who are blessed with a combination of racism and arrogance seem be those people who find it easier to get on TV news interviews.

I can also be no coincidence whatsoever that the gentle art of snobbery always seems to find itself inside the hollow souls that you dread being stuck near at parties.

TechTags Plugin [ BNP | Crystal ball | Directories | Organizations | Paranormal | politics | racism | Television | UFO | Unidentified flying object | snobs | snobbery ]

I am so truly incredulous that the body set up to stop MP’s stealing money via expenses is going to cost six times more than the money the MPs were stealing in the first place, that I can’t even put pen to paper.

I’ve had to transfer my mind elsewhere – into the world of music – to stop me thinking of it. £6.5 million per year, every single year, to stop MP’s wetting their beaks. See I can’t do it …

TechTags Plugin [ Music | rap music | swearing | sexism | racism | MP | MPs | government | expenses | Independent Parliamentary Standards Authority ]

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So, the UK Government has lost the Binyam Mohamed torture appeal. Maybe I’m seeing things a little too simplistically here – but why should how he was tortured be kept quiet for ’security reasons’. What he said – yep, I can see why that should be sat on. But how we made him say it? Come on …

TechTags Plugin [ Binyam Mohamed | chidren | David Miliband | frogs | Guantánamo Bay | MI5 | muppets | National security | Torture | UK Government | United States ]

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I am not turning into the person I had planned for myself, that’s a fact. The person people see is not, in fact, even the person I think they should be seeing. I know I’m not alone – at 18-19 anything was possible … then kids!

Lucy Thorpe, an old colleague, nailed the excuse for me when I was lamenting my existential crisis over on Twitter. I was feeling sorry for myself and she offered me someone to blame. It’s the children’s fault. Without them I’d be a jazz poeting traveller with houses and women around the world.

So let this come as a warning to you all! Yes, that includes you Charlotte and Dean …

TechTags Plugin [ business | career | children | Education | England | Existential crisis | life | parenting | Twitter ]

I don’t have a problem with optimism in dogs. I love it. Every next second is potentially the best ever to a spaniel and I accept that. In people, however, optimism can be tiresome. Come to think of it, pessimism can be tiresome too – yet I don’t mind that in cats. So there you go, 2.5 sentences wasted on my indecisiveness.

I do however, have some top notch science at hand to workout which breed of human I am dealing with. It involves the simple introduction of a spider.

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